Wednesday, April 30, 2008

How to stop "You never called me back"

The problem with follow up is most people don't know how to do it appropriately. So they end up playing tag and then wondering, "have I pestered this person too much?" The answer most likely is yes.

Not because you are calling them too much but because you never set the expectations upfront before emotions became attached. For example, imagine that you have a conversation with Joe and you end it with, "so Joe, when should we touch base?" Joe says, "I will call you next week." That is usually where the conversation ends. Now next week to you means by Wednesday while to Joe it means when I have an answer, which many not even be next week! So you call him on Wednesday and leave a message, "Joe, it is Aaron calling to touch base. Give me a call when you have a chance. I am in today."

Here are all the points wrong with the above conversation:
1. There was no closing of the loop. Once Joe said, "I will you next week." It was left open for interpretation.
2. Emotions got tangled in to the who is calling whom, what happens once the call doesn't happen, and are you devaluing me by leaving me hanging.

Follow this simple step to REMOVE the emotion and close the loop:

Always make sure you have agreement on the next course action AND how you will touch base if that action doesn't happen. So after Joe said, "I will call you next week." Aaron should have said, "Great if I don't hear from you by Friday, how do you want me to follow up?" or "Great, if I don't hear from you by 3 PM on Friday I will give you a call."

Remember once emotion is attached to an unspoken expectation people become more irrational if the unspoken expectation is not met. Therefore your goal is to get that expectation out in to the open BEFORE it happens.

Anne Warfield, www.impressionmanagement.com